During the bike ride I sat down one evening and wrote about maps. This passage is an example of one facet of my approach toward overcoming the emotional scars. I recognized there was knowledge, but the question was, what knowledge would work for me? There were people who spent their whole lives studying psychology, but did they study the correct thing? What if they spent their whole career studying the wrong thing? What if they took the wrong path for me?

Somehow, I recognized the difference between different forms of knowledge. Some were useful; others took up valuable space and energy for the task at hand. I believed in what was described in the first vision about Eclectic Knowledge. I sensed the Eclectic Knowledge and it was inside me. I followed the path inside me, which was the correct path to solve the problem. Other people were smarter than me, more educated, and older; of course they were, I was only an adolescent, and couldn’t consistently impress anyone; but, my path was inside me. To follow the elder, the smarter, the more able was to fail, for my path followed through Eclectic Knowledge, which came from God, and the intelligentsia of the universe!

Sounds crazy! But thankfully I believed it. If you the reader can’t tell yet, I seemed to be driven by an unknown power. This power took over at some point. I talked about getting knowledge from somewhere, and “hidden wisdom.” On February 7, 1977, I wrote:

“I don’t remember how I knew how to dissipate. It seemed pretty obvious that I could, sort of like looking at a lamp, and theorizing if you pushed it, it would fall. Maybe it was God. It quite possibly was this “hidden wisdom” I sometimes have. I sometimes know things without having any practical experience to know them. Sometimes I hear voices in my sleep teaching psychology.”

On Oct. 2, 1977, I wrote:

“I’m battered and bruised, but I’m successfully dissipating everything. I’m as hard as rock. I’m getting strength from somewhere.”

So as you read about how my path lead to overcoming the torment, consider your path, and pray that you’re on the path God has chosen for you! See that being on the right path can make all the difference, even when it comes to overcoming the impossible.

At this point I’d like to say that…

…In the description of the hospital experience, I spoke about prayer and superstition and how these and similar ways of thinking are related to the thoughts of a two year old, specifically, my thoughts as a two year old. I said that I had begun several dangerous thought patterns in that I believed thoughts could come true. To think a thought, I concluded, was to want the thought. To think about victory, is to want victory. To think of death is to want it, and so on…
Everyday we hear about a coach who wears a shirt or piece of jewelry for good luck, or a ball player doing the same, attributing significance to objects otherwise of no significance. Creating a relationship and giving value to an object that has no relationship and no value to the goal at hand. This is a way of thinking that is common for people. A perfume present during a notable experience will be remembered and noticed when smelled again. A person from the past will create feelings that have no relationship to the person at hand.
How much more powerful will be a thought contemplated at an early, vulnerable age? A thought in the future that is comparable to this thought will stir great emotions, for it will be treated as similar or the same as the original. The coach who keeps the good luck charm is thinking similar to the traumatized, associating two unrelated things, one victory, and the other an inanimate object. So when I stated that “…My love for her seems to have become inflamed,” I was associating two unrelated things, the trauma from the hospital and the interest in a girlfriend. I was thinking like an athlete associating victory with a sock, ring, and any number of mostly unrelated things.

This thought process acted in me reflexively, not consciously. So as I thought like a coach or athlete, I sunk deeper and deeper into trouble as more and more powerful thoughts and feelings were related to those of the present moment. I sunk deeper and deeper into the quicksand of the past.

The traumatic thoughts from the past acted like a prayer because they were dwelled upon, meditated upon, over and over, like the throbbing of an aching wound. Consequently, this begs the question, “What kind of person would think such a thought? And repeatedly, for that matter!” Well, it’s logical to conclude that a person of less virtue would, since of course, the thoughts are undesirable, if not immoral, socially unacceptable. So here I am again, and here are the traumatized, thinking like a child and believing some thoughts are good and some are bad, which causes gilt by association.

And so I hope you can see the difficult hurdles before me as I launched my attack against the torment. It was these things and much more that I had to visualize, conceptualize, and conquer! Clinging to an object or a thought is habitual. I had to understand the process that got me to the habitual thinking and lash out at the powerful emotional trauma, changing the dangerous thought patterns infesting me.

Overcoming powerful emotional scars demands the ability to objectively look at alternatives and choose the best one. Logic and good judgment are needed to navigate through the stormy waters. But, you must be able to see clearly through the haze of emotions and confusion.

During these tough economic times, we need wise leadership. If your child was sick with a 105 temperature, you wouldn't go to a politician for advice, but a doctor. Our economic problems are too serious to trust to a politician. Tax policy should be set by someone trained in economics, like Ben Bernanke, a person we can trust to make objective decisions, not buy votes.

It's disappointing that so much time has been taken debating tax policy, rather than debating a new direction for our country. I don't think either candidate is qualified to make tax policy, nor that's what we need. What does low taxes mean for the unemployed? We need a new direction in this country, one that will create good paying jobs.

A major premise of overcoming powerful emotional scars is seeing different alternatives and choosing the most constructive. We can create good jobs by becoming energy self-sufficient. That would be a constructive decision in the haze of confusion and emotion, one that I believe is necessary to cure our sick economy!

In these tough economic times, remember that you can't lose everything because you will still have the richness and treasure of your thoughts! Our value comes from within, not the material possessions we may or may not have.

Read the description of the hospital experience. When I thought I had lost everything, I realized I hadn't because I still had my thoughts. In the end, my thoughts were the most valuable thing.

We need a new direction in this country and the world, not more emphasis on temporary pleasures and material possessions. Take the recent problems as a wake-up call and turn them into a powerful force for constructive change.

God made this day, so be happy in it!

By learning about the miracle inside my mind, new doors will open and new opportunities. By understanding the miracle inside my mind, the world will change and what once seemed important may seem trivial. By looking at things differently, by understanding what happened inside my mind, barriers will fall and your world will expand!

JUST CLICK ON THE PICTURE OF THE SUN!

Above all else, remember what is said on the first page of my website: "I believe that your greatest wealth is inside you."

To fully understand what that means, study the MIRACLE INSIDE MY MIND!

The size of our countries financial problems isn't the issue, but our inner resolve to overcome them! It's not our financial problems that are the challenge, but ourselves. We compete only with ourselves! The financial crises of today must be won first in the mind, heart, and soul of every citizen!

What does today’s financial crises have to do with emotional trauma? Well, I’d say a lot. I believe we’ve gotten ourselves into this mess because our government is in, and has been, in a state of denial.

Our government has sought to deny the reality that markets have ups and downs, and sought policies that pursue only ups and no downs. This is against economic law, and has caused the downs in the stock markets and housing markets to be catastrophic, rather than a normal part of the business cycle.

This is similar to a traumatized person avoiding thoughts and ideas, leading to inner tension and subsequent emotional deterioration. If you study the miracle inside my mind, you’ll learn about the “View of the Mountain,” as well as many other ideas that are vital to avoiding this type of incorrect thinking. You’ll understand how I overcame the mistakes the government has made. You'll learn how I overcame powerful, mind-controlling ups and downs, and learn to apply it to your life. Hopefully, someday the government will make wiser decisions, because in the end, we are all slaves to the truth.

Improve yourself, improve the world!

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These pictures were taken on my vacation in Maui this summer. We traveled to the top of the crater Haleakala! With the attitude that emotional problems are a mountain to be climbed, you'll find the strength to reach the top just like me! Believing that the problems of the world are a volcano of opportunity, you'll change the world! The top of Haleakala wasn't half as hard to reach as the elusive mountain inside me!

In the last entry, I said that I am not my thoughts. This is a very important concept that allowed me to overcome powerful emotional scars. However, in chapter two I wrote: "The existential idea that only a thought that is wanted can exist in the mind proved valid..." In the end, I wanted my thoughts. In the end, I loved my thoughts regardless of how abhorrent and socially unacceptable they appeared.

Although you aren't your thoughts, you choose them. It may seem not so, and it did to me for years until I was finally able to reach the mountain top and see the truth! If you don't want your thoughts, it's okay, but understand that someday with greater understanding of yourself, you may see that, indeed, it's not the rejected thoughts that are the problem, but your reaction to them.

And so it is in the world! The most important thing isn't always the "big bad problem,"
but your decisions in relationship to it!

Improve yourself, improve the world!

I am not my thoughts. If I hate you, I am not the thoughts of hate, although the thoughts are inside me. If I love you, I am not the thoughts of love, although they are inside me. And so it is with emotional trauma.

The thoughts of emotional trauma are not us. That’s why in chapter one I said: “The traumatic feelings and thoughts were a part of me, but not me. They were a part of my consciousness, but not my consciousness—like a hand is human, but not a human being.”

The above words are so important to me on a lot of levels. My hand is human, my flesh, my skin, and all of my body. But my body doesn’t make a human being. Something much more than flesh and bones makes a human being.

A body and soul make a human being. If you study the miracle inside my mind, you’ll see that the soul can win over the body, and that’s why I was able to overcome powerful emotional scars.

To study emotional trauma is to examine the human decisions which are based upon our painful thoughts and memories. How decisions are made will determine how well we weather the storm of emotional trauma. We can decide to allow the emotions to consume our lives, or we can forge a new path through the pain.

A decision is often the result of several years, if not decades of human experience. A conclusion based upon inner thoughts and emotions can perpetuate them. It's important to examine the basis of a decision and decipher whether it comes from concrete facts, or, if it's based upon emotions (which can distort thinking). Deciding that there has been suffering, therefore there will be more, represents a thinking process that should be flagged, examined, and overcome. The fact that there has been suffering doesn't mean there will be more, just as rolling a seven doesn't increase the chances of rolling it the next time. Emotional trauma doesn't have to be forever if the decision is made to analyze it, find its source, and create new ways of seeing it.

I examined myself and was able to trace the trail of my thoughts and emotions, unraveling the basis of my thoughts and decisions. This allowed me to think differently about the emotional trauma. You can too. In chapter one I wrote: "...This allowed my thoughts to become a choice, regardless of the mental pictures, images, and feelings echoing from the past..."

The above is very important in the world. We must analyze the way people think and make decisions. A friend may feel resentment when we don't listen to them, and be patient for years, only to lash out unexpectedly. Sometimes actions take years to take root, but the wise will anticipate the decisions before they're made, and proceed thoughtfully. To overcome emotional trauma is to become tuned in to what leads to actions and decisions, for as the anatomy of our bodies are the same, so is the logic of our thoughts!

Improve yourself, improve the world!

Emotional trauma causes mental images and feelings to intrude in our lives and influence our thoughts. When I was overcoming emotional trauma, I learned to identify the images and feelings in my mind. I had lots of them. Identifying the images and feelings is beneficial because I got to know them, anticipate them, and prepare a response.

Familiarity with the images and feelings promotes emotional stability.

Point out the habitual response to an image or feeling and look for assumptions regarding it. For instance, the assumption that an image or feeling should be shunned needs to be replaced with the idea that it should be embraced and loved. You assume it's shameful to have the feelings and images and habitually avoid them when in fact they are an important and valuable (although painful) part of your life! The assumption is the enemy because it causes denial, and keeps you from yourself. In chapter one I wrote:
"...An assumption is like a person who moves into your house, taking it for granted that they have the right to tell you what to do..." Evaluate assumptions, reexamine the response to images and emotions, and see yourself grow as a person!

The above is very important not only in the mind, but also in the world. Prejudice is like emotional trauma in that a fixed thought (image) is cemented in the mind and accompanied by the assumption that it is the correct idea, erroneously controlling thoughts and feelings! Be careful about assumptions, because what you take for granted and overlook could be what's holding you back, not the enemy that "lurks in the shadows," or is "obvious," or the one that's been battled for years.

Improve yourself, improve the world!

The miracle inside my mind demonstrates just how far a human can go. It's like studying a species and discovering new behaviors and capabilities. They can jump that far? That high? They run that fast!

You can enter my room, and play in my expanded world! New doors have opened for humankind, and new possibilities. My world is a world that mental conditions are seen as something to be climbed, like a mountain. Overcoming mental problems is a sport, and once engaging in this sport it's meaningful and fun.

There is sadness to letting go of old habits, just like climbing a mountain and saying goodbye to the goal. But it's okay, because once overcoming yourself, you'll make better decisions and the world will benefit!

It's difficult to imagine that something terrible can become one of the most positive and important things in your life, but emotional trauma was for me. It allowed me to find out more about myself and therefore, other people.

Emotional trauma is like an unwanted visitor that expects to be treated like a special friend. It sits meekly, waiting for your response. You must realize that there is a difference between the experience and the wound. It's okay to hate the experience, but not the the emotional trauma. In chapter one I wrote:

"If you’ve been emotionally traumatized, sit down with your visitor. Talk with your visitor. Give the visitor everything it wants. You’ll find that the visitor isn’t so bad, and everything it requests is what you’ve been longing to give. In time, you’ll realize the pain isn’t the visitors fault, and invite the visitor to stay; you’ll realize the difference between a bad experience and the reaction to it; you’ll distinguish the difference between the cut and the cause. It’s okay to feel bad. Hate the experience, not yourself. The visitor will become one of the most loved, important parts of your life..."

In chapter two, I wrote:

“…My thoughts were home inside. I could think anything and it was worthwhile—God doesn’t make junk thoughts. Previously shunned thoughts were gathered around the altar, like children during a Sunday Mass, and told they were valued and loved. I loved these thoughts more than any thought in my mind.”

The traumatized must understand that they were meant to be traumatized. In this way, they were called to be traumatized and to overcome it.

Don't focus on the inner world without respecting the outer. Clean up the inside by self honesty, and clean up the outer with a sincere days work and an act of kindness for a friend. Work for positive ideas within and constructive ideas in society. For this reason I say, improve yourself, improve the world!

You are a part of the world and the better you are the better the world will be. If people in charge have their act together, especially world leaders, the better we'll all be!

Seeing emotional trauma in connection to the wider world and even the universe is like a powerful energy source for the traumatized. Doing so provides purpose and meaning. I saw emotional trauma as a challenge from God. You can too. Your life has meaning because God is challenging you to become more by overcoming it. Emotional trauma can become one of the most important and positive aspects of your life, just like my emotional trauma became for me!